Respect: Part 1
I chatted with a lady the other day who was having difficulties living with her husband. I gave her some really good advice, but after she left, I realized I hadn’t given her anything concrete to think about and practical thins she could do. So, here are some thoughts on what wives respecting their husbands looks like:
First, love Jesus with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength. Also, remember that in the Bible love is not primarily about emotions, it is about obedience:
“Jesus answered and said to him, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word; and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our home with him” (Jn 14:23).
And,
“But whoever keeps His word, truly the love of God is perfected in him. By this we know that we are in Him” (1 Jn 2:5).
When we walk with God by obeying him, we are filled with joy and then, even things that are normally difficult, if God commands us, we can do with that same joy.
Second, realize that God’s command to respect your husband is one of these commands.
“Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband” (Eph 5:33).
And,
“Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel—rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror” (1 Pet 3:1–6).
Third, remember that while you are respecting your husband, you are really honoring and obeying the God who loves you and sent his son to die for you. Therefore, you are not entrusting the outcome of your respect for your husband to what happens with your husband, you are entrusting yourself to the one who judges righteously.
“For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps: “Who committed no sin, Nor was deceit found in His mouth”; who, when He was reviled, did not revile in return; when He suffered, He did not threaten, but committed Himself to Him who judges righteously…” (1 Pet 2:21–23).
Photo by Vidar Nordli-Mathisen on Unsplash
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I think, Mike, that we usually associate the word ‘respect’ with ‘admire’ and ‘look up to.’ That’s why if a husband is gambling away the household money, or running after young women, or being harsh at home, the wife asks how she can respect that. How can we, and why should we respect sinful behavior?
So if you can clarify that you aren’t saying to admire sinful behavior, it may make more sense to the women folk.
Yes, she isn’t to cheer for the sin or probably comment on how hard he’s working when he’s sinning. She needs to find other things to cheer for. Thanks.